Need help with books/music/etc.

[greenroots]

Hey, my girlfriend of 4 years pretty much cheated on me and already replaced me and I broke up with her.

I've been doing good sorta. All the post-feelings about deserving someone better, realizing I'm better off, etc etc.

But, I really would like some books and music to kind of fit the mood that are also pretty good. I don't really think sulking in it helps anything, but she did share my musical and movie collective with me and that kind of hurts to look there for comfort.

So I need some new books, new music and shit.

I tried reading Love Monkey tonight after reading High Fidelity, but I can't really get into that one.

Got any good stuff for misery, rejection, pain, loneliness?

[nahadaran]

heroin

[Fishticky]

Hmm, well I recently went through a similar breakup (except it was for only 10 months, and she didn't cheat, she just found another guy and quickly broke up with me for him).

I found that listening to love music didn't help AT ALL. Instead, try poppy music. Wilco's summerteeth was an amazing 'cure'. It made me smile and at least think I was happy for the first few weeks. Also, I developed an extremely unhealthy addiction to Pulp, it seems upbeat enough with deep enough lyrics to make you think about stuff, but not in a sad reflective sort of way.

On the other hand, if you actually want real love songs (again at least for me they just made me wallow even more), then I'd say go with 69 love songs by magnetic fields. They've pretty much covered every aspect of love in some song or another on there.

As for books, it's hard for me to recommend anything. I found I couldn't read without thinking about things, for it was much too lonely an activity.

On the other hand, what I found helped more than anything, was going out and being near people. There is this great indie cafe place that I started hanging out at, and although at first I sulked and just thought about things, but then I met some really great people, who all helped me completely forget about things.

Haha, I probably wouldn't be writing such a serious post if such a thing didn't JUST happen to me (about 4 weeks ago). And although I'm sure it'll take you much longer than me, hell you'll probably eventually find someone twenty times better than her. Or you can get famous. And rub it in her face.

And remember, the best thing Wilco ever said, "How to fight loneliness: Smile all the time"

[boyindrag]

the stooges - raw power, song nr 5: your pretty face is going to hell

[TapeDeckGhost]

It's not good to try and forget. Remember, and let time do it's thing. It's kinda hard to recommend things since I don't know what you've read or already own and listen to.

Jesus' Son : Denis Johnson (great book! You'll feel good after reading about this guys misfortune.)

[purplehaze8x]

x

[lou2ser]

You've been dating her since you were 14? Consider this a good thing and go out and meet people.

As for music, i used to listen to alot of sebadoh and sentridoh because it deals with alot of unrequited love.

[BigBlackSmoke]

whoever said jesus' son, I second

[kteberry]

It's never too late to start listening to Morrissey and the Smiths...


And I really like Kurt Vonnegut books. They dont really have anything to do with breakups, but are fun to read.

[greenroots]

Originally posted by lou2ser
You've been dating her since you were 14? Consider this a good thing and go out and meet people.

As for music, i used to listen to alot of sebadoh and sentridoh because it deals with alot of unrequited love.

15*

And thanks for all the advice and everything.

I'm not really looking for love songs. I've been listening to:

Pretty Girls Make Graves - The New Romance
Devin Davis - Lonely People of the World Unite
Cursive - Domestica
The Smiths - Louder than Bombs
Regina Spektor - Soviet Kitsch
Jens Lekman - Oh You're So Silent Jens
Les Savy Fav - Go Forth
The Dismemberment Plan - Change
Portishead - Portishead
Desert City Soundtrack
Deerhoof (for happiness)
Beulah - Yoko
Monk and Coltrane


Alot of stuff she listens to that I do, because I showed her. It upsets me because I want to listen to Neutral Milk Hotel or the Good Life but can't bring myself to it when I see something on her blog that says she's got it playing.

It makes me feel like a person that I felt did a terrible thing to me is getting satifaction out of music that I just fuckin' want to listen to and soak into and start healing.

I'll check out those movies and books. And I'll try to find somewhere to hang out that other people hang out too.

My city sucks. But I'm at least going to try. There's a nice coffee shop that is sort of indepedent I should hang out in and read.

I'm just working at Target now, and trying to scrounge up some money to move away and I'm looking at schools and stuff. (I've had a year off and kind of spent all my time with her, bah. I can see how well THAT payed off.)

No heroin plz.

[Edited on 1-26-2006 by greenroots]

[birdman]

Siddhartha- Hesse

[magneticrollerskater]

get some woody allen books, not movies, books...it should cheer you up

[auxiliaryoctopus]

I will assume you have Cherry Peel by Of Montreal? Bedside Drama? Gay Parade?

[greenroots]

Originally posted by spiritualdishwasher
Step 1: Stop reading her blog.

Yeah, I started doing that.

I wouldnt post her blog on here, I'm sure you could really find it if you tried.

Her mom actually commented on a thing I wrote this morning on my blog and I was just like WTF and deleted it.

I'm going to take these book recommendations and rent some out to read when I go to the cafe.

I might even ask this one girl to get some coffee with me too that I work with, she's nice.

You've been so nice for such a seemingly anonymous group. <3333.